A dear friend of mine called me regarding my two previous blog entries and we talked about the question of how it is possible, for example, to raise two kids in the same way, while at the same time differently in a way that they don’t feel any unfairness under any circumstances?
In the literature, experts talk a lot about how we can pass on the basic values to our kids during their first years of life. In my case, I spent all of my time with my kids until they learned to talk. At that time, others could also easily understand their communications. I found the teenage years to be a similarly critical phase and I was happy that life gave me the opportunity to be with them and to be able to answer all of their questions personally.
Those who are past this phased can agree with me that a child’s strongest abilities and capabilities become apparent at the beginning of adolescence. You probably remember well having to make the decision to put aside the question of our own convenience and accept that although our children have got the same upbringing, they have different abilities and capabilities and therefore we have to look for different schools after elementary school, at the latest… and thus starts a seemingly never ending frenzy.
… and in the meantime, we are continuously juggling – even with Christmas gifts, we must take care not to let any child feel that the other has received a more or better or precious gift.
And yes, we make mistakes in the process, but just so that we can correct them and show that we too are infallible. The most important thing is to set an example that we are willing to do our best, but there is always the possibility to do things differently, to choose a different, a better path!:o)